busfarts

i guess it's not cool that i had no shame about farting on the bus until i noticed i was sitting next to a hottie.

makin mushy

try makin mushy with all your favorites!
- ice cream!
- casseroles!
- anything that shares a plate with mashed potatoes!
- birthday cake!
- bean burritos!
- the indian lunch buffet!
- 7 layer dip!

lunch plans

eating in the employee lounge vs eating at my desk depends entirely on who walks in while i'm zapping my food.
it's a good strategy to look overwhelmed with work just in case.

wish you were here

to see how damn cute this outfit is!

no tea calls for wine

thank you, tea partiers, for getting the word out that the red line above union station is a scary ghetto!
my friends on the green/yellow also extend their heartfelt appreciation.

eat. pray. love. but especially eat.

no dessert till bali.

not fair

why you gotta mess me up like that, Bloodsugar Plum Fairy? i only had veggies for lunch like a good girl.

ladies lunching at dc coast

it's so weird being here and not at the bar.
and it's so delicious!

don't mess with texas sized margaritas

expandosas

how does 1 dosa in mah mouth = 10 dosas in mah tummy?

wwgd?

priorities

...but mad men's on!
ugh.
george costanza would know how to fix this.

today's balls out award goes to...

the dude who pushed a woman out of the closing doors of a packed train. by her face.
(it received a smattering of applause throughout our car.)

welcome to your 30s!!!!

please familiarize yourself with the following upgrades :)

fat girl problems

aw, jess! how hysterically endearing is throwing your back out fighting with your fridge?

"telling the chiro 'i was drunk' doesn't help."

i am totally not shaving until he calls

dating economics:
i wanted to grow out my hair enough to get waxed. but a date tonight = emergency shaving = i can't wax.
but if he doesnt call, he strikes out = i dont need a wax at all = i can blow that $40 at dc coast!

applause for jen!

i hope one day i have a story like that...

dating myself