major boobage

can't pay models for tasteful figure studies?
make em tasteless.
they'll pay you.

lola loves this dress

i can rate my outfits by how how many coworkers flirt with me during a shift

kim massie and the weiner man

hot night
hot mamma
hot dog

6.23.12

caroline for the win!

just cause it zips don't mean it fits

you'd think the day of the wedding the bridesmaids would be tending to the bride
but they're too busy tug-of-war-ing my corset down to my dress' size. 

off to chicago!

this post should be about weddings
but instead it's about roaches

sick of this shit

i'd say my neighborhood is a piece of shit, but it's so much more than that

meet shara

lone exception to the "leggings are not pants" rule

dream team

jen steers
stef drinks beers

lola float trip

getting smashed in the great outdoors is my new favorite company party

st. f*ing louis

"we know we did a shitty job for you but we thought it wouldn't matter."

humiliation is forever

when i was in the 3rd grade i was sitting next to nisha on the bus one day and she sneezed a long florescent green booger into her hand.

so if you hear "don't worry, people will forget all about that" it's a lie.

we can hear you. all of you.

you can't just walk across the 14th street bridge, you gotta rap across it.

a playful breeze on a summer day

really pisses me off when i'm painting

new work friends

animals with rabies make me feel like snow white

peein at the ritz

fun fact: hotel bathrooms are clean and open to the public, so long as you look slightly better than homeless.
plein air potty problem solved.

lesson of the day

sensei says: don't be stingy.

plein air scare

outdoors is covered in bugs

birthday bender buffer

birthday week ends with a scheduled hangover day for naps and netflix.

iz brilliant.

we all scream!

for I SCREAM CAKE!

show me burlesque

mae west and green fairies and fire and evil hate monkeys and aerialists and shriners and midgets and jingle bell g-strings and fiddling and sparkles and boozin and strongmen and tassels and bacon cupcakes and carney games and bling and hootin and hollerin...and tits. and ass.

birthday week is tits

and sparkles!
and more tits!

birthday week show business

the early show ain't nothing like the late show

birthday week pedis

luxe livin!

birthday week burlesque

a year ago dr jen walked across the stage at the sheldon in a velvet cap and gown and some hot heels.
this year rose royce walked across the stage at the sheldon in those same hot heels. different gown tho.

first stop: hoagie city for pancakes!

painting is not good for socializing

i forget how to stop thinking.

painting is good for my brain

i forgot what it was like to be thinking all day.

phone date with jess

7pm is a pretty ambitious hour

problem #2

plein air potty options are evil and scary.
i suffer for my art.

step one

the first step in plein air painting is a step outside.
it's harder than it seems. for starters, most of april was in the 40s.

like a sensei

makin it look easy. 
michaelnearyart.com

la vie d'un artiste

so i've got a new full time job.
learning plein air painting from mike, the legit artist.
there's no pay. no coffee in the breakroom. no high heels and happy hours. no gchatting. and it's pretty hard.

i'm finally getting to do what i wanted to do when i grew up.

cinco de mayo: late night

crowds hailing taxis and EMTs.

cinco de mayo: off to a good start

chicks passed out in the middle of wash ave like it ain't no thang

end of the line

by the time it was over i was getting drunk with velcroboy, getting harassed by blues fans, and getting over working this hard

this is ARTwalk

• drawing group at Lola
• hot jams on the front stage
• a fan buying me shloada drinks

under the marquee with a bottle of bubbs

now showing:
ARTwalk

mid-day crisis

no time left to get my own art up

foundations in failure

learning hard lessons in "the show must go on"

it's show time!

artwalk starts here

the story of artwalk

at the brink of failure the cavalry arrived!

today i said "you'd better impress me, st louis!"

and it farted and turned over in bed.

the bbq

babies and foodbabiesmmmmmm

thought you'd be better at breakups

working at the hipster club felt weird like high school.
and quitting the hipster club was weird like high school.

some like it hot

Rose Royce likes it on fire
*that volunteer from the audience does not

ARTwalking

what can this bitch can do with no budget and a few all-nighters...? http://www.facebook.com/stlartwalk
will this be a sensational new downtown event or a total shitshow? place your bets now!

vintage trouble: pandora that shit right now!

best damn show i've seen in a longass time. think "blues brothers blokes"

cheers

working at blood & sand was like working at cheers.
if cheers had a hostess who never knew your name.